I don't know what to do.

Sounds familiar?

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Since I quit my job, I've felt helpless or thought, 'I don't know what to do' 'How will it work out?' 'Will it ever work out?' and blah blah blah until a few days back I realized, 'Well I am living my worst fear, what do I have to fear now?' and at that moment I knew I was going to be okay. These confusing thoughts generally show up when you are not actively doing something, or doing something that is not fulfilling you, or when something doesn't go your way. And that's exactly what was happening, or at least I thought that way. I was sitting on my couch brainstorming 'how to make it work' and ended up applying to 50 jobs because I had attached my worth and productivity to making money and working in corporate, which was a little bit insane if I think about it now. I received calls and offers as well but in that moment another realization hit me that there was an excellent reason why I quit my job in the first place - because I wanted to focus on studying. So, where is this helplessness coming from?

It's the pressure of figuring everything out, which was a little bit too much of a pressure so much that my constant state of living became anxiety and that's unhealthy. I took help and started therapy (multiple reasons) but I did get to know that you can always ask for help. Yes, chances are people may turn you down or may not help you but what if they do? What if someone wants to help you because it'll help them too? So anytime you feel 'I don't know what to do, where do I even begin?', first of all, breathe. Do one thing at a time. Social media has made it look like it's easy, it's not tiring, that you are supposed to be hardworking while being grateful while being emotionally available and honestly it is the most bullsh*t thing I've come across because let's face it, we are humans. We are going to get tired. We will procrastinate for 10 minutes on social media. We will sleep for 2 hours instead of taking a 30-minute nap in the noon. Why? We are humans. On some days, it'll be more difficult than the others but that doesn't mean you are a failure or you are not doing well in life.

Also, anytime you look at someone who seems like 'they have it all figured out', let me tell you one thing - they have help. They ask for help. So, if you feel you need to "figure it out" all alone, let me burst your bubble - no, you don't. Oh and FYI, asking for help from your friends and family or anyone else for a matter of fact doesn't make you weak or less than anyone or less enough or any of the things similar to that. It doesn't. So, if you are reading this blog, then maybe it's because you needed to hear it. And finally, it's alright if you don't know things. You can ask, you can learn, and give yourself the time to go slow. Don't rush your life. Your journey is very different from others, and that's a good thing. You've got this. Take care. - Written by Vanshika Patil